Comedian Jeff Foxworthy: You May Be A Muslim

You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. You may be a Muslim

You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes..
You may be a Muslim

You have more wives than teeth. You may be a Muslim

You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Muslim

You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide. You may be a Muslim

You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against. You may be a Muslim

from http://www.siotw.org/modules/news_english/item.php?itemid=737

You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Muslim

You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Muslim

You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.
You may be a Muslim

Your cousin is president of the United States. You may be a Muslim

You find this offensive or racist and don't forward it. You may be a Muslim

source: http://www.siotw.org/modules/news_english/item.php?itemid=737